the lie that looked like a monster

I'm not sure if this was the best way to handle this situation. I am open to any feedback about my situation.

First I want to reiterate that I believe Madeline is a wonderful 4 (and a half, she reminds me) year old girl. She has wonderful qualities that place her beyond her years. She walks around with a compassionate heart, and a desire to serve others. She is loving and thoughtful. She is my precious daughter, my only daughter. And I adore her.

On Wednesday, she told me a lie. While I knew that she was lying, I wanted her to confess to it. She wouldn't. I asked her, Madeline, this is what I saw you do. Did you do that, yes or no? Now that I'm writing it down, I feel like an idiot because if I saw her do it then of course I knew she did it. But I wanted her to own up. The lying really bothered me. So after I asked her those questions (for an hour - Nathan called me Jack Bauer), she is crying and telling me that she doesn't want to get into trouble; she asks me through her tears Is it lying if I say 'yes' or 'no'? I almost laughed.

I finally said You will not get into trouble. Just tell me the truth now!. She finally admitted her lie and just sobbed in my arms. I held her and then took some time for myself to decide what to do next. I can either be so harsh on her that she will continue to lie or I can try to make this more of a learning experience so that she will understand why it's not okay to lie.

I told her that she wouldn't get into trouble for telling me the truth, so I told her that instead of being in trouble she would just have a consequence (same thing, I know, but she doesn't realize that yet). So her consequence was that since something unkind came out of her mouth, her mouth would not enjoy any treats for 2 days. She accepted that.

Then I told her that she would have to do some homework. Oh, I just love homework, she gushed. Great. Take your drawing book and draw a picture of how you feel when you lie. Now draw a picture of how Jesus feels when you lie. How Mommy and Daddy feel when you lie. What a lie looks like when it comes out of your mouth - does it look like a pretty flower or an ugly monster?

Mom, I'm tired of doing homework. Yes Madeline, but when we lie, we must do our lying homework.

Fast forward to this morning, when her consequence is now over.

Mom, can I have treats again? Yes, Madeline. Tell me what you learned. Lying isn't good.

I don't know how she will proceed in future situations. I explained to her on Wednesday that when she disobeys, she will have a consequence. And then if she lies on top of that, she will be in big trouble.

I don't know what triggered such anger, anxiety and frustration with her lie. I guess I felt disappointed that she fought so hard to hold onto her sin. Something I struggle with every day of my life. It somehow feels more frustrating when I try to save her from her own sin. But she has to learn in her own way and with her own choices. I just PRAY that the Lord will give me wisdom. I don't want to beat her over the head when she makes a mistake. Yet I don't want to let her off the hook too easily.

Sin is not a joke. I take my job very seriously.